Why is there still snow?

I'm back in Canada, and happy to be home. Puerto Vallarta was an amazing vacation, and I can honestly say I've never had a better vacation. My trip last summer to Vegas was fun (our friend's wedding was unforgettable), but this? Totally relaxing and reinvigorating.

Well, maybe not so reinvigorating, I've done nothing but sleep since I got home, but still relaxing!

Some of you may have seen some of the photos from Mexico on "The Facebooks" already, but I'm here to provide a bit more context than you may or not need to a few of my favourites.

This is one of the first vehicles we saw after we landed, a truckload of mexicans hauling bananas. You just can't plan for that kind of authenticity!

Jen and I went on an excursion to downtown Puerto Vallarta on our first day, and decided to ride the city bus. As you can see, drivers in Mexico don't, as the experts would say, "Give a Fuck."

Forrest Gump is my #2 favourite movie of all time, so of Jen and I had to visit the theme restaurant! We brought glasses like those home, and the shrimp was fantastic!

This was probably the coolest place we stopped for a drink. This little bar is in the local flea market, and the bartender has just about every drink imaginable. This is only the table level liquor, he had a three tier rack above us as well completely filled with booze. He made pretty alright Caesars, a drink we never expected to find in Mexico. But, Mexicans have Clamato, while the states doesn't. Go figure.


We visited a private beach you can only get to by boat. On the ride back Jen and I were standing on the ship's bow, and suddenly, everyone started clearing the deck when the dude standing next to me came up. I was the last person left up there, and got pulled into putting on a rock show. There's a video of this somewhere, I'll see if I can find it.

We went on a tour of this mining town that now produces coffee. They only had these tiny cups to sample with. It was okay. I brought some beans back home, because...why not? Coffee is good for you.



Here's a tequila distillery that we stopped by on our way home from the mining town. That white spout slowly drips processed tequila into that glass carboy. They let me sample straight from the tap. It was...warm tequila. Good though.
These guys don't sell their product in store. You have to come to this distillery to buy anything. I'm pretty sure the tour we were on provides most of this businesses income.

And that's about it! We did a whole lot more, but there's tons of more pictures that are still at home. In summary, Puerto Vallarta was amazing. I'd recommend it to anyone who wants to take an affordable vacation somewhere warm, and if you do go, let me know. I'm ready to go back!

Los Lobos - La Bamba

Eastbound and Down

I'm Goin' to Mexico tomorrow! Puerto Vallarta to be exact. I'm ready to get a healthy dose of sunburn, tequila, and sand up my shorts. This town looks alright:
Although I'd like to arrive in Puerto Vallarta on this:
I'll be taking a plane from an airline I've never heard of. I hope they serve mimosas, because I love OJ and Champagne! People have mentioned getting drinks like this on their way to Mexico, and I don't want to be the exception.

I'll be gone for about a week, and even though I realize lately I've been bad at updating Hammelltime (sometimes I'm actually busy at work. Hard to believe, I know), I'm going to be extra terribad til' around next Thursday or Friday. Maybe even Monday. So check back in sometime in seven to ten days for updates and pictures from my trip down south.

In the meatime, you can watch this GIF that plays backwards in a humorous manner.

Inapproptiate Background Chatter

I'm going to Mexico next Wednesday, and when you travel south of the border, there's apparently a lot of horrible diseases you have to deal with.

I needed to go get some shots, and as I discovered, everyone my age from other provinces has been vaccinated for hepatitis. People from Manitoba? Apparently not. I guess health standards are so high in the Keystone province we don't have to deal with those diseases people from the other western provinces of BC and Alberta are prone to catching. I can't tell you if Saskatchewan vaccinated against Hep A or B back I was younger. Maybe someone reading this can inform us all.

Anyway, last night I was at the bar enjoying wing-night with a large group of friends when I received a call from the Health Nurse. She'd given me my Heb A injection just a couple weeks ago, and sent a request to Manitoba for my health records, since she found it odd that I wouldn't have all the same vaccinations as everyone else.

“Hello Jacob? This is Lisa. We got your health records from Manitoba..." She informed me, "It confirms that you didn't have any hepatitis vaccinations.”

“Is that so?" I replied "I figured as much. Nobody I talked to from back home said that they had theirs either.”

By this point, everyone I was sitting with had figured out I was talking to health nurse, and began shouting “Jake has AIDS!” and “Jake has herpes!” On top of that, the loudest song in the world started playing.

I'll you this, it is really hard to have serious conversation with a health professional when people are screaming about various sexually transmitted infections that you may or may not have in the background, while Def Lepperd is blaring away at the same time.

I think she started to get a little irritated when she started explaining that I need to take serious precautions against coming in contact with any foreign bodily fluids, because I hard to cover mouth so she wouldn't hear me trying not to laugh as my girlfriend began to chant

“You have herpes! You have herpes!”

I think this is a little embellished, but that's what I'm pretty sure was happening.

She quickly wrapped things up, urged me to make an appointment right away, and told me to be careful in Mexico. She's a really cool health nurse! When I got my shot, she gave me a Spiderman sticker.

So, just so everyone knows, if you're from Manitoba, and born after 1988, you might not have any vaccinations against horrible diseases. Oh, and there's a worldwide shortage of hepatitis vaccine, and supplies could be critically short by October. So...maybe look into getting some shots.

And for the record, I do not have AIDS.

The herpes test is pending.

Paper Lions - Traveling